Family Visit

My family was in town for Easter weekend. It was great seeing them. We did a lot of touristy stuff since this was the first trip to L.A. for my parents. The coolest thing that we did was go to The Getty Museum. This museum sits on top of a huge hill and is more of a compound, than a museum. They have gardens, multiple buildings with tons of different types of art, and one of the best views of L.A. The best thing about it is that it is free to the public. You have to pay $7 to park all day, but other than that you can stay there as long as you want and they have lots of places that you can sit and just be at peace. It was a very inspiring place, and I think I will go back there a lot.

My sister stayed with me in my apartment. We had a really good time just hanging out and watching Arrested Development. My sister told me about Arrested Development last year and it has become my favorite show. In my opinion it is the best show on television and if you are not watching it yet, you should be.

One of the WEIRDEST coincidences in my life occurred while my parents were here. About 5 years ago I shot a short film for a student at Columbia College in Chicago. His name was George and he was the writer/director. I can’t describe the experience in words, but if you ever watch those movies about the making of a movie where everything goes wrong, this experience tops all of those combined. I hadn’t really thought about it in a long time, except to tell people a funny story about being an actor. My family and I were driving up the coast to Malibu. The road you take is Pacific Coast Highway and it was under construction due to rain and mudslides on the highway. It was getting near to lunchtime and since traffic was really bad, we pulled into the first restaurant we saw, a place called Dukes. I noticed one of the waiters looked familiar and I asked our waiter what his name was. Our waiter said that his name was George and that he was from Chicago. It was the same guy. I talked to him after we ate lunch and the one of the first things out of his mouth was “I’m really sorry about the film”, which I found hysterical. He had moved out to L.A. about a year and a half ago. We exchanged numbers and I left it at that.

I really would like someone to figure out the odds of me running into him out here after all these years. I bet that odds are better that we would have lived out here for fifty years and never run into each other than to have randomly picked his restaurant to eat in with my family.

I strongly believe that things happen for a reason. I believe in the random acts of the universe having some sort of equation and that we need to be open to seeing them. I don’t really have anything in common with this guy and I don’t know if I will ever speak to him, but it is just too big of a coincidence running into him to not be aware of that.

My parents also got to see me perform in an improv show Saturday night. It was a really small crowd, about 8 people. The show went okay, but I have come to realize that I really don’t like to do short games for an entire show. I like the freedom of just having a half an hour and from one suggestion from the audience, the improvisers with me create a piece of art that will never be duplicated again. I think I am going to audition again at Improv Olympic out here. That is where I believe I can grow the most as a performer.
The catering company that Rockstar works for hired me this week. He put a good word in for me with the company and I think that is why they hired me since I have no experience in the catering world. I also have a phone interview with a company tomorrow for a job where I will be following up with schools on sample textbooks that this company has sent them. The good thing about it is that I can work from home and the money is really good. The bad thing about it is that it sounds too good to be true, and that means that it usually is.

This entry has been all over the place and for that I apologize, there was just a lot to write about over the last week. More movie reviews will be coming tomorrow as well as some more Overheard Conversations.

Great Week So Far

My last day of work at the hell job was on Tuesday. I just couldn’t do it anymore. I feel like I didn’t accomplish what I set out to do, but it was really affecting my life much more so than I thought it would. The money was nice, but I am better off without it.

Every day before people can leave work, they have to get waved down by a metal detector wand. If you have a bag, you open it up, they look inside, then you hold your hands out to your sides and they give you a quick wave with the wand. Not many people knew that it was my last day. I only told my boss and he only told the few people in charge. I hate going through the “why are you leaving” story to everyone. And since I was leaving after only a month, I am sure that people would take it personally.

One of the guys he told, Sam, was the person that was examining people with the wand the day I left. I opened my bag, he looked inside and then I held my hands out to the side. I guess he thought that I was looking for a hug, because he kind of went in for one. I must have pulled back because he stopped and then held out his hand. I shook it and he wished me good luck. Lucky it was my last day or else I would have had to see that guy and wonder if he secretly wants to hug me.

I am so glad that I don’t have to go back there. But I bet you readers are happier that you don’t have to hear about the job anymore.

I had two great improv classes this week. Monday I did really well in the rookie class and Wednesday, I did really well again in the advanced tryout class. One of the guys in the advanced class came up to me during break and asked me if I wanted to perform with his group on Saturday night. My family is in town for Easter so that will be cool for them to see me in this new theater.

They are getting into town today and everyone is looking to me for an awesome time. I think everyone comes to L.A. thinking that this is the best place on the planet and that some sort of wild adventure is awaiting them. I only know the parts of L.A. that I hang out at and I don’t think my family wants to go eat take-out at the corner Chinese restaurant or go to a friend’s house and play Halo for 7 straight hours. I will have to come up with something, or this might be the last time they come.

Second Improv Show

I had my second show tonight at the theater. I thought it went pretty well. We had a better crowd than the first show, with about 20 people showing up. I think I did okay, but still don’t think I did as well as I could have. Most of the people in the show did very well, so the show overall was funny and a lot of good people did a lot of good improv.

Here is my one overall critique of people doing “prepared characters” for an improv show. If that is how you want to perform, fine with me. I don’t choose to put a lot of time into a costume or props because that is not going to make your character or your show funnier. If you come out in a funny costume, you may get one first laugh but then you have to have some weight behind it. One thing though really is starting to annoy me. We all know that gay guys are HILARIOUS. Especially the “flaming” gay guys. They are the funniest of all. We all know it. They way that they speak with a lisp, they way that they all wear t-shits with slightly sexual titles on them like, “I’m with him, literally”, or “Call me Betty” or “My boyfriend has this same shirt”. The way that when they speak everything they talk about is sexual. All traits that have been bred for comedy. BUT CAN STRAIGHT GUYS PLEASE STOP DOING THESE CHARACTERS IN IMPROV SHOWS. Just once I would really like to see someone portray a gay guy as a completely normal guy, who happens to be gay. Who doesn’t talk with a lisp, who doesn’t bring up sex every six seconds. Please, I would really like to see that. But the audience loves it. It always gets a huge laugh when a guy walks out on stage with a really tight t-shirt, some sort of funny hat, some sort of jewelry and begins a scene talking about how he loves to go shopping, listening to Liza Minelli and having unprotected sex with strangers. But please give it a rest for a while. Thank you.

In case you didn’t get it, the description of gay men in the above paragraph was meant to be sarcastic. But I was serious about being tired of seeing it in shows.

Weekend Recap

This past weekend was pretty good for the ole Bryster. On Friday night, I took my buddies Rockstar and the Reverend to a party for a friend of mine that I knew back in Chicago. It was a St. Patty’s Day / Housewarming / Birthday party. But I kind of forgot that it was her birthday until we got there and people kept wishing her a happy birthday. I felt like a dick. But I made up for it by taunting her that she was going to get back together with her ex-boyfriend. I am so great at parties. If you want a guest that completely alienates themselves from most of the other people within minutes of meeting them, I’m your guy.

Saturday was uneventful. I watched a couple of movies and college basketball until about 9 pm when the Reverend and my other friend Clark came over to play Halo at Rockstar’s place next door. I did some laundry earlier in the day and there was only one dryer that was available. I was 90% sure that it was the dryer that I used a couple of months ago that didn’t work correctly. For some reason the heater is broken on it, so your clothes just get spun in cold air, thus never drying. But since it was the only one available, I used it. Sure enough an hour later I came down and the dryer had not worked. All of the other dryers were occupied still and I was just going to leave my clothes in the dryer until one of the other ones opened up. But the acting building manager, Peter, came down to switch his laundry. He asked me if I was using the dryers and I told him that I used one that is broken. He has only been helping out in our building for a couple of weeks so he didn’t know about it. He asked me if I wanted to use it again just to make sure. I said that I was now 100% sure that the dryer was broken and didn’t want to use another 75 cents on it. He told me that he would give me the 75 cents to try it again. So I took his three quarters and started chit chatting with him about the building and stuff and I was not paying attention so I put the 3 quarters into the same machine that already was drying stuff. I realized my problem and so did Peter when I yelled out “Oh, shit I put them in the wrong one.” Peter took out his wallet and apologized that he did not have another 3 quarters to give me. I felt bad that I had wasted his quarters so I took out 3 quarters of my own and put them into the dryer that I knew did not work. Then I had to pay another 3 quarters to get my clothes dried when another dryer opened up later. That’s how a simple dry cost me $2.25, plus 75 cents of Peter’s money.

Halo was a lot of fun. We try to do it a couple of times a month. Basically it used to be just me, Rockstar, and the Reverend, but since Clark has moved here, he has joined us. We sit around for about 5 hours and drink beer and scream and kill each other. Nice way to relax on a Saturday evening.

Sunday was pretty much the same. I watched a movie, went to a new grocery store that I am pretty happy with and then went to my second show at the improv theater I have been taking classes at. A review of my show will be forthcoming.


Here are some quick movie reviews of movies I have watched recently.


Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow:
This movie came and went in the theaters rather quickly. It takes place in sort of a comic book 1940’s. If you every watched old science fiction / adventure movies or television shows from the 50’s, you would enjoy this. I would hesitate to call it an animated movie, because all of the actors are real, but they shot everything against a green screen and animated everything else around them. Rooms, cities, vehicles, landscapes, everything is computer generated. But it is not the usual computer generated images; it is some sort of new process that the director came up with. It gives the movie a whole different look and feel to it. Having said that, I really enjoyed this movie. I love movies like Indiana Jones, the Phantom and The Rocketeer. Sky Captain reminded me a lot of those movies. If you like this type of movies, or are in a mood to try something different I recommend this movie.

Alien vs. Predator
They titled this movie AvP to make it cooler. No matter what they titled it you can’t escape what a big piece of shit this movie really is. If you are a fan of either genre of creature, stay away from this movie. Some of the action scenes have neat special effects but it was not enough to keep me from hating this movie from about 30 minutes into it. I watched the “making of” documentary on the extra features and figured out why I hated it so much. The writer director of the movie is Paul W.S. Anderson. Now don’t confuse him with Paul Thomas Anderson who wrote and directed Boogie Nights, Magnolia and Punch Drunk Love. This Paul W.S. Anderson has made such craptacular movies like Event Horizon and Soldier. This guy should not be allowed to ruin any more movies. If you want to watch it, don’t say I didn’t warn you.

The Iron Giant
This is an animated movie directed by Brad Bird, who just won an Oscar for “The Incredibles”. I LOVED this movie. It is about a little boy named Hogarth who discovers a big robot in the woods behind his house in Maine. When you were a kid, if you ever wanted to have a robot for a friend or have something unbelievable happen to you, you will like this movie. It is not a musical, but it does have a lesson to the movie that might not appeal to every adult. I recommend this movie to anyone that has a child around 8-10 years old, or can remember what it was like to be a child. You wont be disappointed.

The Straight Story
Some movies are so loud in both sound and visuals that you have a hard time remembering what the story of the movie is. “The Straight Story” is exactly the opposite of a loud movie. It is a really simple story about a 73-year-old man who lives in rural Iowa and his trip to visit his sick brother who he hasn’t spoken to in 10 years. Because he can’t see too well, and he is used to doing things on his own, he ends up driving his lawn mower across the state to make it there. In one sense it is a road trip movie, but it is so much more than that. You find out a lot about this man as he trip progresses. All of the questions you have during the movie are answered in there own time. It is a slow movie, not rushing to get to the point of the trip or to see if he makes it to his brother. It takes its time and just lets you follow the story. Richard Farnsworth is the main character and he was nominated for an Academy Award for his performance. Watching it, I felt like the movie had more of an impact on me because it was Richard Farnsworth’s last performance. He committed suicide a little while after it came out because he had a terminal disease. I highly recommend this movie.

So there are some movie recommendations for you out there. I may just have a weekly movie review entry since I watch about 5 movies a week, but I may keep them in the weekend recap entry as well.

New Class, Surprise Visit

My class on Wednesday went okay. It was supposed to be an advanced class, but it is a little different than that. It is basically a try-out class for people that have shown promise in the rookie classes. There were several people that I thought were pretty decent, but I still felt that there were some people that didn’t quite get it. The class itself was huge, with 22 people showing up on Wednesday. So there was not a lot of stage time. But I did okay in two games and not very good in one scene. The one scene we did was just a basic 3-person scene. I really love doing basic scenes and just seeing what you can build with your scene partners. My scene did not go very well, and I blame myself. One guy kept talking and didn’t give much space for me and the other guy. And the third guy kept just asking me questions so we didn’t make any headway in the scene. I knew this and I really didn’t do anything about it. So I was disappointed with myself.

If you are chosen to continue on from this class, which will be decided in the next couple of weeks, you are placed with 7 other people and that is your team. You rehearse with them and you perform with them all of the time. You have 3 shows a month and they are all Sat or Sunday night, which are supposed to be the theaters busy nights. I hope that I make it to the next level, because I don’t think it will be worthwhile to continue with other new people for the money that I am paying per month.

After class I drove to a Denny’s right by my place and met a friend of mine for a late meal. I met him on the set of “Drawing Blood”, an independent film that I shot right before I moved from Chicago. I really didn’t know him that well when we were shooting, but he seemed like a cool guy. He lives in Houston, TX and was in town for a few days. I was a little nervous because I don’t know him that well, but he is a really cool guy and we had a good time at Denny’s. I always like to stay in contact with people that I meet on projects because you can always count on a surprise visit every now and then.

Another Overheard Conversation

In my Monday improv class there is a woman named Laurie. She is a complete weirdo. Most of the time she is doing scenes, she turns the subject into something graphically sexual. It can become very uncomfortable for the people on the stage with her. Topics she has brought up during scenes include telling a couple that the reason there kid is having problems is because he is autistic and not masturbating enough, so they should encourage that. Also, she sang a song about her partner onstage with her being her brother and that their relationship is strained because he made her give him oral sex when they were kids. I think that she has some issues that she is trying to deal with on stage. Her voice is annoying as well. She is blonde and has a very high-pitched voice. Much like Marilyn Monroe or Joey Lauren Adams. So when she talks, she sounds like an airhead. I never really paid her much attention when I wasn’t on stage with her, but I overheard a conversation she was having with a new guy in our class.

Laurie: What’s your name again?

Luke: Luke Barnett.

Laurie: Barnett. Isn’t there a famous stunt man named Barnett. Maybe in your family?

Luke: I don’t know. If there is someone in my family that is famous I hope I get
to meet them.

Laurie: So, no one named Barnett is a famous stuntman?

Luke: I don’t know. Not in my family.

Laurie: Well, stunt people like to remain unknown. Could that be possible?

Luke: Could it be possible that there is a famous stuntman in my family that I
don’t know about.

Laurie: Maybe your father?

Luke: Oh, uhh I don’t know.

Laurie: You don’t know who your father is?

Luke: What?

Laurie: You never knew your father?

Luke: Uhh, no I know my father; I was saying that I don’t know if he is a famous
unknown stuntman.

Laurie: Oh.
Luke: So is there a famous stuntman whose last name is Barnett?

Laurie: I don’t know. Why?

That was the end of that conversation. Class went pretty well. I don’t think that I did very well, but I did okay. I am looking forward to my advanced class on Wednesday. Hopefully I do well there and I can move on and rehearse and perform with some other people.

First Show

I had my first improv show this past Friday night. I was coming from Beverly Hills because I had a job interview for Fogo de Chao at 5:30. The interview went well, but I don’t think they are going to hire me right away. The woman that interviewed me told me that when they open a restaurant they only hire the bare minimum number of people that they need and then as the restaurant grows they hire additional people. She knew that I had a full time job right now, but I told her that I could start immediately because I did not like my job very much. She also told me that she lived in Dallas, TX. I told her that I lived in Richardson, TX for a couple of years when I was a kid. Weirdly enough, that is where she lives. So we talked about it for a few minutes and I think it may have helped me in the interview so maybe they will call me in a couple of months to be an add on person.

I left the interview at 6pm and had to be at the theater by 7pm to get ready for the show.

When I was coming to L.A. the only thing I was really worried about was the traffic. Everyone always tells you that the traffic in L.A. is horrendous. It is bad, don’t get me wrong, but it is just as bad in Chicago. Only in L.A. you usually have a longer distance to go because this city is so spread out, so the traffic seems worse.

Well, I guess the worst place to be on a Friday in L.A. is in Beverly Hills. Everywhere I went I hit traffic. I tried to take side streets, main streets, highways, but everywhere I went there was a wall of cars. So by 7pm, I was still pretty far away from the theater. I called the director and he told me that I could still be in the show as long as I made it there by show time. The show started at 7:30 and I got there at 7:25. I was placed in a few games that I had done in rehearsal and one that I didn’t know at all. But I was not nervous because it’s improv, you just make stuff up.

One thing I did notice was that a lot of the people in the show were obsessed by costumes. The greenroom has a bunch of clothes and wigs and props that people can use as part of the characters that they are going to play on stage. I didn’t use any props or costumes because this is improv and you are just supposed to go with your gut reactions on stage and I think that if you have your character all figured out and dialogue all thought out that it really isn’t improvised.

Also, I don’t know if this is just this group of people or indicative of L.A. there were people that could not be quiet backstage while other people were on stage performing. I don’t get it. There is only a thin curtain separating the stage from the greenroom and people in the greenroom where talking, laughing and one guy was playing a guitar. One dude even tried to get me into a conversation and I was whispering to him, and he kept asking me to speak louder because he couldn’t hear me. I wanted to choke and say,

“Motherfucker, there is a show going on. If I am whispering, there must be a reason, think about it”.

But I didn’t, I just told him that I would talk to him after the show.

All in all, I was very happy with the show. We had a small crowd of about 8-9 people but they were pretty active in their participation and laughing. Our director was very happy and told us so during notes. I have always been told that while a director is giving notes, you just listen and acknowledge them. But the same guy had to talk during the notes and then if the director gave him a note that could be understood as criticism he would launch into a story about the reason that he did what he did, usually because someone else had done something wrong. I wanted to kill him then also. But the director was patient and we all went our separate ways after the show.

I was pissed when I got back to my car and saw that I got a parking ticket for being in some residential zone without a sticker, but I was pretty happy about the show and so I didn’t worry about it.

I went home and picked up my friends the Reverend and Rock star. We went over to my friend Clark’s house to play Halo. Clark just moved here from Chicago with his girlfriend a couple of weeks ago, so I wanted him to get to know the Halo gang because he will have fun with them. We played Halo until about 2 am and then I took the boys home.

Saturday was spent watching movies and writing and making some killer spaghetti sauce.

I have decided that this coming Friday is going to be my last day at this present job. I really just can’t stand it.

When We Practice To Deceive

I finally figured it out! I know why this job has been so difficult and no one is helping me. The guy that had the job before me did a little bit of everything. No one else in the office really knows how he did some of the stuff that he did. He had to go back to the Philippines for about 6 weeks because of a visa problem. He comes back in a couple of weeks, and I am suspecting that I will be let go upon his return. If I am doing his job, what is he going to do when he gets back? They told me that he is going to be working on some other type of project, but never told me what that project was. If he comes back, and has been doing the job I am doing for about 3 years, why would they keep me. They have started giving me potential customers to sell our stuff too. I really don’t like sales at all. I did it for about a year and a half and hated every minute of it. So if they only want me to do sales I will quit. But I think I won’t have to do that. Wait and see.

I do have an interview for a restaurant position tomorrow. The restaurant is called Fogo de Chao. I don’t know if I spelled it right. There is one in Chicago. They are building one here now. I filled out an application to be a dishwasher during late shifts. I really wanted to have a job that I could do a couple of nights a week just to make some extra money. The restaurant is in Beverly Hills and it is pretty expensive. I kind of hope that they want to make me a server because I bet you could make some really goof money, but I don’t have any experience, so that is why I applied for a dishwasher position. How hard could that be?

Friday night is also my first improv show in L.A. I am looking forward to getting back on stage. I really am not that nervous yet, I usually get nervous right before I go on. Like sick nervous. Like I could just walk-off and never come back, nervous. But it always goes away once I step foot on stage. Other than that there is not much going on here.

My family is coming in a couple of weeks and it will be good to see them. I miss them a lot and we always have a great time when we are all together. This will be my parents’ first trip to L.A. and I am curious to see what they think of it.

One last thing for today is a piece of advice. Now I know that all of you out there like technical little gadgets. And most of you don’t have that much money. But I want you all to STOP BUYING CRAP! There is a reason that a store is selling a no-name brand DVD player for $20. It sucks. This is especially for those readers out there over the age of 70. I know technology can be scary. I am not looking forward to the next fifty years and how I will fall further and further behind in my knowledge of all things technical. It has already started. I don’t know anything about MP3 or WMA or IPOD players. But I am happy in my ignorance and if some business that has one of the following words in the title “Discount, Cheap, or Rip-off” I steer clear. I urge you to do the same. Otherwise you are going to get your new gadget home, realize that is does not work and then spend the next two months dealing with companies like the one I work for trying to get it replaced or fixed. Then you will have to pay more in postage to send it in than you did to buy it in the first place. It is worth it to pay a little more and buy something from a real store, than to deal with all of the cheap crap floating onto our shores. I feel really bad when I talk to someone who bought some brand I have never heard of and they want a refund but I can’t help them. They bought it at some Discount Expo or something and that expo has moved on. So they call me to see if I can help them. Well, I can’t. Even if I want to. So save us all a little heartache and your self a big headache and put in the extra money to buy something that will last more than 1 month.

Thank you.

Tomorrow Is Another Day

I used to have a CD by Ice Cube that had a song on it titled “Today was a Good Day”. That pretty much summed up today. I started out the day at my crappy job, but somewhere along the way a feeling of peacefulness just came over me. I realized that I don’t have to work at this job any longer than I want to. That I will just keep my head down and do the job as best as I can for as long as I want. I am making good money and I can take care of some “life” stuff along the way. I just stopped caring about this job. That does not mean that I am not going to do it and do it as well as I can, but I am not going to worry about it.

I also didn’t hurt that I got my first paycheck on Friday. I am able to pay some bills that I would have had to put on my credit card, which is what I am trying to pay off. I am one of the only people in the world who like to pay bills. It’s not so much that I like paying the money, but I like the finality of it. Writing a check, mailing it and knowing that I won’t have to worry about it for another month. Somehow that makes me feel good.

I was also told about a simple opportunity at work that I can make some extra money with. Basically, one of my bosses came up to me and asked me if I ever sold anything on Ebay. The reason was that he wanted another way to move merchandise, and he didn’t really know anything about it. He wants me to place an Ebay ad for our merchandise and if I sell it, I can make a little extra money. I don’t know how much I can make, but it should be pretty simple to do, so that may speed up how long I have to work there.

On top of all of that, when I got to improv class tonight the teacher called me and the other new kid over and told us that he realizes that we are advanced for this class and that he is going to put us in higher level class for a couple of weeks to see how we work out. If we work out well, we can move up into that class and get some more opportunities to perform. He also asked us to perform in our first show in a couple of weeks. That started the night off pretty well.

Then I saw an ad in the window for some sort of Stand-up troupe. I think it is a class and they have performances at the same theater. I am going to give the people a call and see if I really have what it takes to do stand-up.

If that wasn’t enough, at the end of class he was asking some of the students in our class if they were available for a show on Friday. A couple of them were not, so he asked me and the other advanced guy if we were available. Normally, I don’t get out of work until 6pm, and the call is 6:30, so there is no way that I can make it, but on Friday’s we get out at 4:30 so I told him I could be there.

So this Friday will be my first performance in Los Angeles. I feel a lot better about life right now, just had to go through an adjustment period. But I need to give a big thank you to all of the people that have called or emailed over the last week. They were all just checking in on me to make sure I was doing okay. Thanks to all of them, I am.

Week's End

The latter part of last week went by pretty quickly. Nothing new at work. I still don’t like it very much but I am getting used to it. I spent the better part of Thursday dealing with Jimmy from Discount Electronics. He wanted to order a bunch of televisions with VCR and DVDs, all different sizes. I gave him prices for every model and he wanted me to drop the price for every model 2-3 dollars. I asked my boss and he told me the prices I gave him were the lowest that we could go. Jimmy threatened to go to another company, wanted me to personally check our inventory, called me every five minutes to check on the discount price and then ended up ordering the products at the price I gave him during the first phone call. So I spent over two hours for what should have been a ten-minute phone call. But at least it killed some time.

I went to a get together for my friend T who was turning 33 this weekend. It was nice to catch-up with him since I haven’t seen him in a while. I met him while doing a “pilot” for a really bad television show in Chicago. We hung out for about 15 hours before we shot our 30-second scene. So we got to know each other pretty well. He was making a movie called “The Promise of You” with another friend of his. He thought I would be good for a part in the movie. I ended up shooting that movie with him, and some of my best friends came from that experience. I just watched it again recently and I was really proud of how it turned out. It is a really special time when you are working on a project with people who are doing it for no money, just because they want to be there.

I finally went shopping for some real food. I had been getting by on just sandwiches and microwave dinners for a while, but I was starting to feel unhealthy, so I bought a lot of good stuff for me. Veggies, fruit, chicken breasts, turkey meat, and tuna fish are all back on the menu at my household.

I have been really lazy lately about a lot of stuff. I haven’t worked out in God knows how long, but I need to get back into it because I can feel myself getting soft. So I am instituting a walking regiment for the morning, just so I can get my body started off right. I also bought stuff for breakfast, which is something that I almost never eat. I usually get by on just coffee.

Two new movies viewed this weekend. I will do a quick review.

Open Water: I had heard a lot about this movie when it first came out. It is a low budget movie, shot on Digital Video about a husband and wife who are left behind on a scuba diving trip and they spend most of the movie in the water with sharks. The big “story” about this movie was that the real actors were in the ocean with the sharks swimming around them. They were wearing “shark armor” which is a suit of chain mail that the shark’s teeth cannot pierce, but they were right next to them.
I really did not like the movie. For some reason the way it was shot and edited bugged me. It has nothing to do with the fact that it was Digital Video, just the way it was made. I also think some of the acting was bad, but who am I to criticize.

Comedian: This is a documentary of Jerry Seinfeld creating a brand new stand up act, since he has retired the old one. It follows him as he goes to different clubs in NY and tries out material. It also follows a young comedian named Orney Adams as he seeks fame and fortune. I really like this movie. It is really interesting to see how comedians get their material ready for big shows. Basically they just go from club to club and see how the jokes go over on the audience. Jerry is funny and you see him interacting with other famous comedians like Chris Rock, Colin Quinn, Robert Klein and Bill Cosby and talking about their lives as a stand-up and where they are today. Onery, on the other hand, annoyed during the first five minutes of him being on screen. He seems really pompous and arrogant and all he cares about is that he is a great comedian and people don’t give him his credit. He didn’t seem that funny to me, but he is a successful comedian.

So there are a couple of movie reviews for movies you might not have seen. I am heading back to work tomorrow and improv class tomorrow night. At least I have something to look forward to.

I'm The Real Slim Shady

Everything is okay! The past two nights a couple of my best friends from college both phoned me because of what I wrote in the blog. They were worried about me. I still hate my job, but everything is fine. I will get through this, and things will go back to normal.

I do still think that this company is shady. They don’t at all seemed to be concerned with the customers and how their lives are frustrated by the pieces of crap electronics that they sell. I keep being told that I spend too much time on the phone helping people with the problems they are having. I guess they don’t care that in the instruction manual there is a listing for our company, my phone number and then a statement saying “If you have any problems, cal this number.” So I try to help people as best as I can, but sometimes things are out of my control.

A customer called in to say that he had bought a DVD/CD/MP3/radio player from our website. On the website, it had a listing for accessories for the player. One of the accessories listed was a TV antenna that works with the player.

The problem that the customer is having is that the player has a different input than the antenna has output. They cannot be connected together. Even though the website AND the instructions say they can. Because in the instruction manual, the player is listed as having an input that fits a 1/8th inch jack, which the antenna has. But the player has a completely different input that is not in the manual. So the customer asked if there was some way it could be done. I asked Igor and he told me the only way to connect the player to the antenna was if the person cut the antenna wire and bought an input that fit the player and then wired it up himself. I told that to the customer and then the customer asked me,

“Why does your company sell a product that is not compatible with the only other product that can make it work, even though your website and the product say that they are compatible.”

I thought that was a very good question and I did not have an answer for him. I went to one of my bosses and told him about the situation and how there was no real answer for the problem.

He said to me,

“Tell him that there is an adaptor at Radio Shack that can fit into the antenna that makes it compatible with the player.”

“Okay,” I said, “is there an adaptor that fits the antenna?”

“I don’t know”, he replied.

“Then why am I telling him this”, I asked.

“You know, play hot potato, keep it out of your hands”, was his reply.
I was not surprised that this was his answer. They don’t care that they keep selling stuff that they know is going to break, or never works. In the hopes that the customer gives up returning it, or the warranty expires.

I have more to do lately, so the days go by faster, but I keep hoping that something better will come along. Tomorrow, Igor and I get to have a training session with a representative of Emerson Electronics because they are convinced that we do not know how to work their Satellite Navigation system. They are convinced of this because almost half of the ones that we sell are being returned because they are defective. People can’t get them to work. Or if they do, the system can’t display the routes they want to take, or find addresses, or basically do anything that it says it is supposed to do.

I spent some time this morning installing an “Earthquake Detection Device” that they want to sell for $200. It is supposed to warn people when an earthquake is about to happen by sensing ultra-sonic waves that people cannot feel, but go out right before an earthquake. I put this up in my boss’s office to “test” it. So we now wait for an earthquake and see if the device can give us any warning.

I don’t think it matters if it works or not. I expect them to be selling it by summer.

89 Days Down

I really did not want to go to bed last night. I was dreading going to work today. I have counted how many work days there are until my 31st birthday. It was 90 as of last Friday. I feel like I am serving a prison sentence. I know this is getting to sound like a broken record, but this is my life. I could have it worse though. Even though I hate my job, at least I have one.

Not much went on at work today. I actually got some stuff done and I felt like I was getting the hang of it, at least a little bit. Every one is still really nice to me, but I feel like a tourist sometimes. Wandering around lost, asking people directions, and having them speak to someone else in their native language and then give me an answer.

I did have improv class tonight, which went very well. There was a cute girl in the class, and she started to talk to me, but she didn't seem that bright and that is a big turnoff to me. Not that I am splitting atoms with my brain, but it would be nice to have someone get my jokes. Re-reading what I just wrote, I realize that I sound like an ass. Maybe I am.

I can't wait to perform. I really miss the old days in Chicago when I had so much stuff going on that I had to actually schedule time-off once in a while. With improv rehearsals, shows, sketch rehearsals, auditions, seeing shows, it can get pretty hectic, but that was what I wanted.

I have started to make some projects for myself to keep me busy. One of them is obviously this blog. The others are as follows:

1. Re-writing a sitcom pilot that my friend Patel and I wrote
2. Starting a book that is based on my move to L.A. but will change once I the character gets here because it has to have an ending.
3. I am going to submit some of my blog entries about extra work to a website for a weekly/monthly column.
4. I am writing some stand-up material because I have been considering trying that out, at least once.

So that is what I am up to at the moment.

In my DVD player is the second disc of season 1 of a show called "Dinner For Five". It is hosted by John Favreau and it is pretty simple concept. Four of his friends in the acting world have dinner and talk about their experiences in Hollywood/Acting. It gives you an inside glimpse into people who are not A-list stars, and what they go through to be an actor. Some of the guests have included Vince Vaughn, Rod Steiger, Peter Falk, Sarah Silverman, Safron Burrows, Marilyn Manson, Andy Dick and Michael Rapaport. If anyone is interested in stuff like this I highly recommend it.

1 a.m. and I am going to call it quits for tonight.