I know, I know.....

I have not written in a long time, but in my defense I have been working a lot lately doing catering and my hours are screwy. Most of the time when I get home I just want to watch a movie and then go to bed. But Rockstar is always on me to blog so here is quick rundown of what went on the last couple of weeks. It is going to be long.

I have been working for the catering company that Rockstar got me a job with. Most of the time I am in the field, but since I have an office background, they asked me to work a couple of days a week in the office for them during the next couple of months. I really don't have much responsibility except to call people and let them know they have work. Everyone is pretty nice and it is good because I can mess around with my schedule and get one that fits with my improv.

I worked a charity event for the Los Angeles Lakers. Rockstar was there along with our friend Mr. Smith. It was in Santa Monica and it was really, really nice. They had a hangar decked out with a casino, DJ, food, bars and pics with members of the crappy L.A. Lakers. Celebrities seen include, Mimi Rogers, Jimmy Kimmel, Jeremy Piven, Farah Fawcett, Elisha Cuthbert and a guy from Star Trek Enterprise. I pretty much just bussed tables in a certain area but I got to walk around and rub elbows with the rich and famous. One note, the ladies of L.A. LOVE their breasts. They were on full display that night. Even older ladies had shirts that barely covered their "enhanced" mammary glands. And I saw a lot of really hot woman with older, ugly men. I will give you two guesses why they were with them, but you will only need one. I guess I better hurry up and get rich so I can get one of those girls and then dump them. Just kidding. Am I?

I also worked at the press premiere for "House of Wax". The celebrities were Paris Hilton, Jared Padlecki, Chad Michael Murray and Elisha Cuthbert. They all seemed pretty cool, but Paris was exactly what I thought she would be. She showed up almost an hour late, looking like she just rolled out of bed. Before she would come to her dressing room, she had her entourage come in and make sure everything was ready. They had to move chairs, mirrors and then whole dressing room before she came in. I was a "talent attendant". Basically I was there in case anyone needed anything. It sucked! I just stood around for 3 hours doing nothing because all of the stars had "people" there that did stuff for them. Finally Rockstar came to work and we got to pal around for a little while until lunch. When lunch time arrived, the shit really hit the fan. The studio people had put the lunch order in over an hour before but it was not ready. So the PR people for the stars were all over the place "Where is the salad, where is the chicken sandwich, THESE PEOPLE NEED THEIR FOOD". They were holding up the line to order food and everyone behind them began to get pissed. There were some crew guys that were laughing about it and now I know why the crew people don't really like actors. I was given a salad and told that it was from the order for Chad Michael Murray. I ran to the dressing room and was met by one of his people.

"What is that" she asked.
"It is a salad for Chad" I answered.
"What kind is it"
"I don't know, they just told me to bring it to him"
"Well, I guess we will have to open it up then huh?" (real snotty)

She opened it up and said "This is Chad's salad" and then stormed off into the dressing room. I silently gave her the finger, but she was cute so I will probably date her when I am rich and famous and then dump her right after we sleep together and the only thing I will tell her is "That is for Chad's salad". She won't get it, but deep down inside I think she will understand.

During this ordeal, Paris had managed to lock her dressing room and needed someone to open it. Her PR person came to my boss, who was waiting for food with us, and demanded that she get someone to open it. My boss, very nice woman, told her that they had to call security because they are the only ones that have keys to the dressing rooms. The mean PR person, replied

"The only reason I am asking like this is because I asked 20 minutes ago and nothing has happened" then she stormed away on her cell phone.

We all looked at each other and I said "that's a fucking lie" and my boss said "I can't believe that she just lied to us". The reason being was that not 5 minutes ago we had been running food in there and Paris's dressing room was open for business. Stupid people.

I left after that but it made me realize what NOT to be like when I get some sort of fame or power.

This past weekend I worked a private party in Beverly Hills. It was for a Jewish family and they were having a Seder Saturday and Sunday night to celebrate Passover. It was really interesting to me because I had never experienced something that intimate from a religion other than my own. Everyone was really nice to me and the family seemed really close. It made me miss my own family a lot. I basically washed dishes and did some light serving and dish clearing. The 3 kids really seemed to like me because they were always coming into the kitchen to say hi, and ask how I was doing. I left Sunday night feeling good and having an extra $30 bucks in my pocket as a tip. Very nice people.

This week my plan is to get an agent, or at least get stuff together to send to one. One of the people that works in the office with me used to work with casting people and he offered to look at my stuff and give me some advice. I am going to take full advantage of it. He is really nice and I will probably sleep with him and then dump him and just say "That is for Chad's salad".

Whatever works.

P.S. My apologies to any celebrity whose name I misspelled. I just don't care enough to check.